Lessons from a Soup Bowl

When Patrick was promoted to a manager last quarter, he found himself in a precarious situation. He had to continue doing what he did as a senior sales resource which was to go out in the field and close deals himself and at the same time had to start leading a small team of three sales executives who were looking up-to him for guidance and motivation. The transition was difficult as he had to change hats many a time in the same day. It started taking its toll, it always does. His team was running in all directions but the one direction he wanted them to.

One evening disheartened he visited his nephew’s home and as children often do, Patrick was made to read to his nephew a story of the wooden soup bowl which went like this…

An old man who lived in his village all his life moved to the city to live with his son who was married and had a family. Upon arriving in the city the father was excited to be with his son’s family and developed a special bonding with his grandson who was 7 years old. Initially everything was fine but as days went by, the old mans son started treating his father badly, he was made to sleep in the servant’s quarters and he was not allowed to eat at the table with the family. This disturbed the old man quite a bit. His grandson too was sad at the way his father was treating his grandfather. One day when the old man mistakenly broke a glass bowl full of soup his son and wife gave him a dressing down and handed him a wooden soup bowl in which to eat his food henceforth. The grandson was heartbroken, he went to a carpenter and spent time making a wooden soup bowl which he presented to his father that evening and said, “Dad when you are frail and old and have no strength you too will come to live with me when I will be all grown up and have a family of my own, this will be your bowl to eat from, take this and bring it along at that time so that I don’t have to give you a glass bowl which you might break in your old age”. The Father learnt his lesson that day and never treated the old man badly thereafter.

The three lessons that Patrick learnt from this story as a manager are..
Set the right expectations- Share with your team in all honesty that just because you have been promoted to a manager does not mean that you will inherit all the skill sets required to lead and inspire a team immediately. Just like the young father in the story, though a father he still had lots to learn and acquire in dealing with his family. Encourage your team to walk with you in your journey of learning by which they too will benefit and grow.
Empathize with your team- Put your self in to their shoes as this will enable you to deal and interact with them in a kinder more understanding way thereby allowing them to give you their best. Something the son never did and then had to be reminded by his little seven year old that empathizing with his father would help him get empathy from his son when he grew older
Lead by example- Do what you believe in and show how it is done, as this is the best way to lead your team and help them to grasp the finer nuances of the sales profession. The little boy did just that he did what he wanted and taught his father a great lesson on relationships.

As you work towards becoming a better leader remember the wooden soup bowl as it will help you brew your skills as a manager and leader of your team.

Fabtoid- A lesson is best given when told in the form of a story, tell stories and weave it with a message for your team, they will learn faster and appreciate the input. Fabian Cowan